May 13, 2013
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Dick Mode
Yesterday sucked.
Saturday I was in school all day… I came home to my husbands first attempt at making dinner. It was pretty good too! There were flowers and a card on the table from he and the boys. I got choked up and the evening was filled with Johnny being sweet and getting up to do things for himself and the boys. Usually, at least it seems, it will just hint at me or tell me to do something for him and the kids. It is kind of irritating. Most men call women nags, but Johnny is certainly a nag.
I was so excited to wake up Sunday morning and go visit our old church! My nephew had his dedication there. I was really hoping the Lord had something special for me…
Nah, all I got was a pissy attitude from my husband. Why? I’m not exactly sure but I really did try to figure it out.
We ended up in the hallway talking with friends during the service. That was basically what the band would do after worship… so when Johnny saw his brother and best friend exit… so did he. Well the kids wanted to go see dad so I took them out there hoping to leave them and return to service since Johnny wasn’t interested and I, as usual, was but never actually get to sit in service. Levi was clingy so I couldn’t return. Johnny says we should just go… but I hadn’t got to talk to anyone yet and that is the best part of church! FELLOWSHIP. So I get a little snippy because he;s wanted to leave since we got there. He won’t go get my purse though and I don’t want to be stopped at the door asking where I’m going since I’m never there and people miss me.
So after our little sarcastic bout in the hallway I just head to the car because now I’m just so upset that he is rushing me and nothing is going well. He finally comes out and some people find me in the car and greet me. Then we leave… I’m trying not to say anything but I’m just not understanding what his problem is. Then he says I just don’t get him. He said that he knew I wanted to talk to people but I should have respected that he didn’t. WHAT? Why? Why couldn’t you respect that talking to people was important to me? Especially on mother’s day… especially after a year of not visiting?
Now I’m pretty pissed off at his selfishness. It is time to go to his moms. We can’t afford to go out to eat with my parents. I felt bad but figured I’d meet up with my mom later on. Johnny tells the boys we are dropping off mommy at home and grabbing Grammy’s flowers first. WHAT? We are not dropping off mommy… you jerk! Mommy may be pissed but she is not leaving her kids and sitting home alone. Granted every mom wants some time alone, but goodness gracious… can someone ask me what I want today? By now I’m piping hot. I’m grateful for saturday evening, but Johnny’s temperament has me so confused and frustrated. I tell him I’m going to his moms. And he says not angry like that because then his family will be more mad at me. WELL THEN HELP ME GET OVER THIS! Gosh darn it… do you even give two shits about me today? What the hell did I do wrong anyway???
We get to his moms he takes the kids in and I’m drying my tears in the car… I decide I will just go alone out to eat with my parents if he’s going to give me the cold shoulder. At least then I won;t feel bad for not spending time with her… even though I wanted to take my kids, they really really wanted to go to Grammy’s. So I play the hand I’m dealt for the day.
We all get home a couple hours later. Johnny is still in dick mode. I finally crack the code slightly. Apparently he thinks I wanted to talk to my ex boyfriends family because they were there. WHAT? Umm they are family friends, but there were literally 2 dozen people I could list off that I wanted to hug and they were not top of the listers. I love them, but ever since the guy told me I should have been his daughter in law… I’ve kept my distance for Johnny’s sake and just because it made things uncomfortable.
To top it off I assured Johnny I wasn’t interested in talking it up with them, and he thinks I’m lying. I have no idea why either.
Oh and then he FB’s that mother’s day should be about moms and kids and fathers should get to go do whatever they want alone. ASSHOLE!
Comments (10)
Awwww! Take care! Guys can be alternately sweet and clueless! They sometimes think you want to do things you never would have thought to do! Give yourself a hug and go for a run as soon as you get a chance!!!
You know, it always seems that something happens on a Holiday with us too. I hate it but it has gotten better. I think we all just try so hard and when one thing goes wrong we fell like the whole day is ruined. I know that seems to be the mind set here. I sat everyone down and told then that things aren’t going to be perfect but instead of getting angry and yelling why don’t we just work it out…
That sounds so frustrating and difficult. I hope therapy helps you guys soon. How is school going?
Wow, I’m so sorry. I think he should want to take you to his family’s no matter what. Well, maybe not want to, but he should be willing to do so. You’re his wife. When he married you, he made you his new priority, so whether they’re mad at you or they adore you, he chose you and you should come first (with the obvious exception of if you had some kind of malicious intent against his family, but I kinda doubt that’s the case). That part especially made me really frustrated for you.
I’m so sorry it was such a rough day. I hope you two can talk about this hurt more later. I really hope he comes to his senses and tries to make up this mothers day to you in some way.
I am going to ask a question here. I wonder why this Assembly allows people in the northex during worship service talking. They should have been in the Service.
Now, your husband was a jerk. If he didn’t want to be at the Assembly, he should have stayed home and you and the children should have gone.
To act the way he did was rude and uncalled for. a JERK yes.
The way I read this about the Assembly, I wonder about his salvation.
But it looks like he is a Dr. Jekyle and Mr. Hyde. Meaning he was nice and sweet to you the evening before and the next day he seemed like the devil.
Sorry you have to put up with that.
He needs to have someone knock some sense into his head.
Take care and I will cont. to pray for you and Mr. Jerk. Bro. Doc
Sorry your special day was ruined.
Bummer!! Sorry it was that way for you.
Hubbies are funny. My wife dumped me for Marty before we married, but wanted me back 4 months later. She still talks about Marty and recently told me a lot about him and their relationship. She clearly loved him, but married me. Some guys have problems with exes.
I feel bad for you–you deserved much better treatment.
frank
WOW! This is interesting. This sounds just like my wife and I. Your words speak very loud. I am curious though, I have just started reading your blogs and am now intrigued to read more, perhaps I will find the answer to my next question in another read of yours but I must ask. Do you love your husband? To me, your words are very harsh, as emotions can be. I’m sorry, please do not take this personal or offensive but it just sounds like your words are throwing knives at your husband. I may be out of place, and though I do not know you or your husband I am intrigued by the situation as it is close to my own.
Perhaps I can give you some insight from a man’s point of view. My wife has had several boyfriends before our marriage, most of which I do not know or really care to know, however, I am jealous beyond belief because of these experiences. I would never really let her know this, she did nothing wrong, but those moments make me jealous as I’m sure my experiences with past women make her feel. I can tell you though that I would get very defensive if we were at a location and her ex boyfriend was there or what have you. Guys don’t like to be threatened. I just read an article that said men don’t like confrontation, which I truly believe, but we also don’t like to be threatened. This usually will put a male in a very bad mood. Defensive, but bad. Not that I’m taking your husbands side, he should have just been able to put it aside (at least in front of you) on your special day. I look forward to reading some more of your pieces and see if I can gain some insight as to possibly some issues my wife and I have. I’m glad I have come across this today.
@intelligence101 - So sorry I’m just not getting to this. I started school a month ago and things have been hard to balance.
I know I can be harsh. I’m kind of an extreme person. It’s difficult for me to pull back when I’m in the mood I was in after this!
I do love Johnny. Am I in love with Johnny? No. It’s killing both of us. He knows me so well that it’s not like he doesn’t feel it, sense it… or that we don’t just blatantly talk about it. I have always loved people in general. I love Johnny deeply. The romantic feelings, however, are non existent right now.
I’m not sure how much you’ve read… so it’s hard to know how familiar you are with my story… I’m an open book though. And if anything I’ve been through helps anyone… it’s at least worth something then. And when you can shed light for someone else, you often find it for yourself too!